As the day is coming to an end, so is the year. And I'm glad this will all soon be over. =) At least, that's what I'm putting my hopes on.
2009 wasn't really my year, so to say. And sad to add, I've sorta gotten the idea so since the very beginning of the year. Creepy, ain't it? I totally remember myself saying stuffs like, "2009 is not treating me well. I wish it isn't 2009." Bla bla bla. Glad I survived anyway.
I know I hadn't been the good Elaine in 2009. Especially in blogging. I'm so sorry I left my blog so long, indiscriminately. You know the funny thing is, I really mean it when I told people who asks, that I had no musings everytime I face my 'Dashboard' page. Everytime I see my 'Edit Posts' page, I feel so guilty and tries so damn hard to finish up my updates. Everytime I enter the 'New Post' page, all I can get are probably the first few lines and then I'm stuck. Seriously did ponder if I should switch to Twitter. You know, one line blogging. Yada yada. But then again, I guess that's just not what I'm gonna do. =)
*Facebook is not helping me in being good, either.*
I could probably have a million excuses why I hadn't been blogging much. *sigh* But I blame it all on 2009. =) This is a 2009 ender entry, so here goes.
As the year ends, so will everything that happened in it, with it. Whatever. I've promised that all of the bad will go with 2009, not to be brought together as I step into 2010. Matter-of-factly, I'm thinking I might not even remember the good ones. For when you want to reminisce of the good times, the bad will prevail in your mind as well. The good and the bad, always go together. The irony.
I probably don't need a reminder of how I dislike 2009 and all. That's why the lack of updates. Blogs are public. Published post are viewed and commented. Words written are evaluated. Bottomline, blogger must be cautious.
Sometimes, somethings I need to rant about could not be made public. It's personal. And through 2009, I found that I ain't that good being metaphoric anymore. It gets pretty tiring when you need to cover up something when you can't even do so. Exact reason why the lines of blogging, instead of paragraphs of entries. It's more relieving when you could just shout out that one line of rants, and noone would question alot about it because noone would be fed enough information to pose more questions. =)
Now here's the thing I've decided. The year will go and it will bring with it whatever that happened. Hence, I would not need to update anymore outdated entries. Yada yada. Good for me, in a way. Haha. What an excuse to be lazy. It helps definitely, to not be reminded of the year. It hurts to prolong lines of entries which requires lotsa thinking of how to put in metaphors. Especially when you don't want to do anymore thinking. Painful~
So if you're reading this, forgive me. The one year had gone with numerous tries to relive the blog, but to no avail. Guess I was too stuck up to be so tied up with whatever that happened that I see no way out for myself. So choked up, yet finds no place I could confide in. Not even my own personal ranting spot. How pathetic. So, this does it. No more. :)
Hear up for my New Year resolutions tomorrow. *hugs* Peace out for now~!
